HEALTH — In a bombshell report released by a group of prominent behavioral scientists located throughout the world confirmed the famously hypothesized type “A” personality label to be short for type “Annoying” personality. “We thought that was clear because those people are annoying,” Jade Rumsfeld, 60, a doctor and member of the group, said during an interview after the report was published, “Type ‘B” stands for type ‘Bandanas’ because those people usually wear bandanas. I don’t know how people didn’t put those meanings together, but if we need to state it explicitly, then here you go.” The report delved into the fact that type “A” personalities will typically reference the fact that they are type “A,” which significantly contributes to how annoying they are and therefore reinforces their identities as type “A” personalities. Type “B” personalities were already known to rarely label themselves, but the fact that they overwhelmingly like wearing bandanas is a fascinating reveal. “It’s all bull shit, though,” Rumsfeld continued, “People love belonging to a group. Everyone’s just a dipshit speeding towards the grave.” Rumsfeld reportedly put on a bandana and rode away on her motorcycle after ending the interview by spitting on the ground. The type “A” and type “B” personality hypothesis is still unproven. However, type “A” personalities will invariably attempt to convince others of its validity in the most annoying way possible. In contrast, type “B” personalities just wear bandanas, and that’s it.