Jackalope Decoration Stark Insight into Friend’s Mental Health

Pictured: An unhinged nightmare.
Pictured: Unhinged nightmare.

UNITED STATES — Friends and family of Jeffery Madison have begun to worry that the 29-year-old background actor has become mentally unstable.

“The tipping point for me was when he bought that jackalope taxidermy and acted all proud of it as if he shot it,” Devin Marcus, 28, Madison’s friend and fellow extra stated in a group chat to their other friends, “There’s something about a dead rabbit with a dead antelope’s horns spot glued on its head that is remarkably unsettling.”

The jackalope is considered a “rogue taxidermy” because it is art made from deceased animals beyond simply the preservation of animals which is done in regular taxidermy. Displaying a jackalope and convincing tourists that it is real has been a tradition in parts of the US for decades.

Despite being regarded as a tradition and fairly accepted taxidermy practice, experts agree that the general public needs to remember that a lot of rabbits, deer, and pronghorn die every year simply to make these little statues for men to act manly around and put beers on or whatever else.

“He kept trying to convince me it was real,” Marcus continued, “Of course I knew that it wasn’t a real animal, but I also knew that it was two real dead animals glued together and that made me feel weird. It’s cute until you think about a bloody, limp rabbit getting horns jammed into its head by some weirdo in a cabin or something. I left after Jeff asked if I wanted to play a drinking game with his ‘friend’ and then he petted it really slowly.”

Sources close to Madison say that he recently started going to gun shows and bought his first gun a few weeks ago from an anonymous dealer. He reportedly asked his friends if they wanted to go jackalope hunting, but the friend group declined after a few days of silence and then alerted the authorities that he may be potentially dangerous.

Comedy Writer