Woman Thanks Boyfriend for Explaining Watchmen During Film Viewing

Pictured: Couple watching Watchmen right before the boyfriend pauses it to explain how Rorschach is the guy walking around with the “The End is Nigh” sign but we’re not supposed to recognize him yet to his girlfriend.

UNITED STATES — Jeanie McGowen, 26, received a pleasant surprise when she and her boyfriend, Mark Donnelly, 30, decided to watch the 2009 superhero thriller Watchmen, an adaptation of the critically acclaimed comic book series which ran from 1986–1987. “He knew everything that was wrong with the movie and paused it every five minutes to tell me,” McGowen told her friends in a group text message, “It was awesome. He’s so smart.” Although most of the movie is true to the original printed version of Watchmen, fans of the comic book series have noted that there are crucial flaws in the movie that ruin various character arcs, remove key details, and completely change the ending. “The movie assumes you’ve read the book because of how quickly they skim over key details,” Donnelly reportedly told McGowen during one of the many times he paused the movie to explain it, “but they’re changing stuff all over the place so it’s like, do you want this to be for the fans or not? Plus, why the hell is it Dr. Manhattan’s fault at the end? Adrien’s plan was to blame the explosion in New York on aliens. Blaming it on Dr. Manhattan wouldn’t unite the world because he’s already an asset of the United States government.” Donnelly went much further into detail about the movie’s poor choices of making Nite Owl look like a cuck and Silk Spector look like a dumb girl who doesn’t know what she wants in a relationship. The viewing ended with Donnelly getting mad that Silk Spector and Dr. Manhattan kiss because “they were over each other at that point and Silk Spector was supposed to be having sex with Nite Owl on the floor” and rating the movie one out of five stars on HBO Max. McGowen then thanked her boyfriend and gave him a blow job for being so cool.