Police Agree to Only Aim Aggression at Mentally Ill from Now On

Pictured: Loveland, CO police officers bumping fists after watching a 73-year-old woman suffering from dementia get her elbow fractured and shoulder dislocated by a fellow police officer.
Pictured: Loveland, CO police officers bumping fists after watching a 73-year-old woman suffering from dementia get her elbow fractured and shoulder dislocated by a fellow police officer.

UNITED STATES — Police officers in the United States have been embroiled in controversy due to their numerous inappropriate behaviors and acts of violence against civilians of various minority groups, primarily black people. “Okay, we won’t go after black people anymore,” Mark Bishop, 45, a police officer from Philadelphia wrote on Twitter, “but we’re still probably going to beat up retards or whatever.” The tweet was retweeted thousands of times and made Bishop the target of a wide range of ridicule on social media. The Philadelphia Police Department has declined to comment on the matter and has not issued any punishment against Bishop. However, a spokesperson for Police of the United States (PUS), a community of US police officers, has declared that police officers are now planning to only target people suffering from mental illness. The exact definition of mental illness was not clearly defined, but Patty Dunkel, 39, a spokesperson for PUS, tweeted, “We have to verbally abuse and shoot somebody, but there simply aren’t enough criminals. So, we’re going to TRY to only hurt people we believe to be suffering from mental illness. YOU’RE WELCOME.” Shortly after the tweet was posted, a video showing officers in Loveland, Colorado breaking the arm of a 73-year-old woman suffering from dementia surfaced online. Businesses in major cities are now just kind of leaving their windows boarded up in anticipation of anti-police protests that will inevitably turn violent once the police designate protestors as “mentally ill” and begin firing into the crowd.

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